Save Western Pennsylvania Middle Class

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Thursday, May 24, 2012

Borowitz Report: U.S. Sends Emergency Shipment of Negative Ads to Egypt Aid to Fledgling Democracy

Borowitz Report

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Mission:

The Western Pennsylvania Middle Class is under threat of extinction. We represent a bi-partisan call to save the Middle Class life style we grew up with and cherish in our region during the 1950's, 60's and 70's. It is our premise that the extinction of the Western Pennsylvania Middle Class is not a historical accident but rather a betrayal of an entire generation which provided the manpower for several wars who made and bought products that fostered American-style prosperity around the planet. This blog will report on the Western Pennsylvania Middle Class; what we can do to preserve our way of life; call out those who betray the Middle Class and be a beacon of hope in creating a Western Pennsylvania future in which all of our citizens have a chance to prosper and enjoy the good life that this region offers all of us. This blogs mandate is to fight for Western Pennsylvania Middle Class citizens as our primary cause. We do not believe our citizens have to be sold out nor should we be sold out to create the Middle Class of India or China. We are proud to be Americans and will not tolerate second class citizens at the hands of the political hacks and enablers.

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DOES KEITH THE CANDIDATE ROTHFUS BELIEVE MIDDLE CLASS WOMEN IN WESTERN PA SHOULD HAVE CONTRAPCEPTION COVERAGE? MITT ROMNEY DOESN’T! ISN’T FAMILY PLANNING AN EOCNOMIC ISSUE FOR FAMILES? DOESN’T BEING AGAINST CONTRACEPTION LEAD TO MORE ABORTIONS? DO YOU MR. ROTHFUS BELIEVE THAT STATE’S HAVE THE RIGHT TO BAN CONTRACEPTION? ROTHFUS WHERE DO YOU STAND?
BE CAREFUL WESTERN PA MIDDLE CLASS! TONIGHT KEITH ROTHFUS’S LEADER OF BELTWAY CLASS WARRIORS PAUL RYAN WILL DEBATE VP BIDEN. HE WILL SAY MANY NICE THINGS. IF YOU AREN’T A MAKER DEFINED BY MR. RYAN, BE PREPARED TO BE KICKED TO THE CURB! JUST CONFESS, DISABLED VETERANS, STRUGGLING SENIORS ON FIXED INCOMES, POOR WORKING MOTHERS AND OTHERS WHO STRUGGLE IN WESTERN PA TO MAKE ENDS MEET: YOUR ARE AMERICA’S EXCESS BAGGAGE!
PAUL RYAN AND KEITH THE CANDIDATE ROTHFUS WANT TO MAKE THE USA A TAX SHELTER! WESTERN PA MIDDLE CLASS AND WESTERN PA WE HAVE A BURGEONING DEBT PROBLEM! DO YOU THINK THEY ARE GOING TO HAVE THE WEALTHIEST PAY TO MAKE OUR NATION A TAX SHELTER! YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE MEDICARE , SOCIAL SECURITY AND COLLEGE LOANS CUT TO PAY FOR PAUL RYAN’S AMERICAN DREAM OF A TAX SHELTER FOR HIS ANY RAND CREATORS! ALWAYS REMEMBER WESTERN PA MIDDLE CLASS: YOU ARE IN THE 47%, THIS NATIONS EXCESS BAGGAGE, ACCORDIGN TO ROTHFUS AND RYAN!
AT THE CLINTON RALLY, BOWZER OF SHA NA NA SHOWED UP AS USUAL TO STUMP FOR CRITZ! THE FORMER GREASER MAY HAVE LOST HIS JAGGER-LIKE BAD BOY SWAGGER BUT HE IS A GREAT FRIEND OF THE WESTERN PA MIDDLE CLASS! BOWZER SURE BEATS A PAT BOONE ROBO-CALL! CITIZEN JOURNALIST SOURCES TELL US THAT BOWZER IS CRITZ’S SECRET DEBATE COACH!
DEAR WESTERN PA MIDDLE CLASS SENIORS: UNDER THE RYAN CULT VIEW POINT ARE YOU A MAKER OR A TAKER? YOU’VE WORKED HARD WESTERN PA SENIORS, AND MANY OF YOU HAVE DEFENDED OUR NATION!! NOW THESE BELTWAY CLASS WARRIOR PHONYS LIKE RYAN AND ROTHFUS CLASSIFY YOU AS A TAKER! IF YOU ARE FOR HONESTY TO REPRESENT OUR REGION GET OUT AND VOTE AND VOLUNTEER FOR CONGRESSMAN MARK CRITZ! ENOUGH WITH PHONYS LIKE KEITH THE CANDIDATE ROTHFUS! ROTHFUS, HIS MEGA- WEALTHY SEWICKLEY MOTHER IN LAW, AND HIS BUFFALO MOTHER ALICE ARE ABSOLUTELY NOT FOR YOU!
DOES KEITH THE CANDIDATE ROTHFUS HAVE HIS OWN “REVEREND WRIGHT” PROBLEM?
IT FEELS LIKE GROUNDHOGS DAY, THE MOVIE! SOMETIME WHEN YOU FEEL DÉJÀ VU, YOU HAVE TO REVIEW HISTORY! HERE’S AN AD TIM BURNS RAN AGAINST MARK CRITZ! MR. BURNS TOOK THE NORQUIST PLEDGE TOO! ISN’T IT AMAZING THIS BURNS AD IS ALMOST IDENTICAL TO ROTHFUS’S CLOSING ATTACK AD! WHAT WOULD HAPPEN TO THESE BELTWAY CLASS WARRIORS IF THERE WASN’T OBAMACARE? WOULD THESE GUYS TURN INTO GRUNTING MUTES! DO THEY HAVE ANY POSITIVE IDEAS OF THEIR OWN BESIDES GOP BELTWAY TALKING POINTS? OH WELL, AT LEAST BURNS WASN’T A FORMER BUSH OFFICIAL LIKE ROTHFUS, PRETENDING TO BE A CITIZEN’S CANDIDATE! ONCE AGAIN IT IS TIME FOR THE WESTERN PA MIDDLE CLASS TO SAY NO TO THE BELTWAY, OUR REGION IS NOT FOR SALE!
KEITH THE CANDIDATE ROTHFUS IS FOR CAMPAIGN FINANCE REFORM! WOW! WILL FORMER BUSH BUREAUCRAT KEITH ROTHFUS ASK BELTWAY LOBBYIST GROVER NORQUIST TO DISCLOSE WHAT FOREIGN COMPANIES, GOVERNMENTS, AND CITIZENS ARE SUBDIZING NORQUIST’S BELTWAY EFFORTS TO BUY A CONGRESSMAN FOR HIS CLIENTS WITH HIS $1.3 MILLION DOLLAR TV BUY! KEITH, YOUR STANCE ON CAMPAIGN FINANCE REFORM IS AS PHONY AS YOUR RESUME YOU GAVE VOTERS AT YOUR JOB INTERVIEW TO REPRESENT THIS DISTRICT?
BREAKING NEWS: WE CITIZEN JOURNALISTS HAVE JUST LEARNED THAT THE US CHAMBER CAME TO TOWN TODAY FOR A LUNCHEON WITH PITTSBURGHERS WHO WANT TO SUPPORT AND ENCOURAGE OUTSOURCING OF LOCAL AREA JOBS! OUR SOURCES STRONGLY SUGGEST THAT THE US CHAMBER REPRESENTATIVES WERE PROMOTING THE CAMPAIGN OF KEITH THE CANDIDATE ROTHFUS WHO HAS BEEN ENDORSED BY THE US CHAMBER FOR HIS STRONG SUPPORT OF THE AMERICAN RIGHT TO OUTSOURCE IN ORDER TO LOWER US WAGES OF OUR MIDDLE CLASS! WERE ANY OF OUR JOURNALISTS WHO WENT TO JOURNALISM SCHOOL INVITED TO THIS US CHAMBER ROADSHOW OR WAS IT A CLOSED SECRETIVE EVENT? WE UNDERSTAND THE US CHAMBER IS HUNTING FOR SOME MAJOR AREA ASSET TO OUTSOURCE TO CHINA! ANY IDEAS WHAT THESE BELTWAY ELITE ADVOCATES OF OUTSOURCING ARE LOOKING TO SHIP TO CHINA?
SINCE LAST NIGHT FOX NEWS PUT KATRINA HURRINCANE RELIEF BACK ON THE FRONTPAGE, WE NEED TO ASK ONCE AGAIN WHAT DID KEITH THE CANDIDATE ROTHFUS DO TO AID HURRICANE KATRINA VICTIMS IN NEW ORLEANS, WHEN HE WAS A BUSH BELTWAY BUREAUCRAT?

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