Friday, October 26, 2012
BREAKING NEWS: SAVE THE WESTERN PA MIDDLE CLASS’S POLL HAS CRITZ LEADING 51% TO ROTHFUS 40%! 9% ARE UNDECIDED! OUR CITIZEN JOURNALIST POLL WAS DONE PRO-BONO BY A VETERAN POLITICAL POLLSTER WHO MICRO-TARGETS PYSCHO-DEMOGRAPHICS!
Here are our top lines: 1500 likely voters polled, including cell phones; margin of error-thin! 52% approve of Critz; while 45% strongly disapprove of Rothfus. 30% of those polled consider themselves takers; 60% makers and 10% are undecided! 60% of the respondents believe Obama to be African American; 25% white; 5% not sure and 10% believe our President to be a space alien! 30% of our sample suffer from ED; 25% have had hysterectomies; 55% claim to be the products of the rhythm method gone terribly wrong! 10% have a moderate drinking problem! When asked what are your biggest concerns: 35% responded Jobs; 30% preserving social security and Medicare; 20% Energy Independence; 10% jackpot payouts at the Rivers Casino!